I remember losing myself. I had allowed way too many things to define me in high school, from a boyfriend to whatever I thought I needed to change in myself to be popular. I had completely lost who I was, and I had no idea how to get it back. I literally had to sit down on my bed with a journal and ask God, “Who am I?” God started reminding me of things that truly brought me joy. I began listing them: I love to read, if I am honest I actually am kind of shy, I enjoy staying home, I love watching movies, I prefer going to bed early, I love mornings, and the list went on and on. As I stared at this new found discovery I realized I had become the complete opposite of who I truly was. No wonder I was so miserable.

We all know that each and every one of us is “fearfully & wonderfully made,” (New King James Version, Psalm 139.14) and that before forming us in the womb God knew us (Jer. 1.5) Very early on in childhood we also know and gain the understanding that we are all different, making each of us unique. With that being said, what we do with the perspective of our differences changes the way we view ourselves in comparison to others.

Therein lies the beginning of the problem, the comparison. We compare what we believe our strengths and our faults are to other girls. Little do we realize that when we compare ourselves to one another we are judging what God created and called “good” and saying it is “not good.” We take on the chant of the world and begin to call things “insufficient” or “not good enough” when Jesus dying on the cross made us more than enough.

God already created you as enough, the final draft, the perfect version of you. Here are a few things you can do to help yourself remember that:

1. Stop Comparing

When you compare yourself to others you will find differences. Why? God intentionally made everybody unique; He is so creative that He wanted you to be your own you. He purposely made your hair different, your skin tone different, your facial structure different, and then He called it good. Who can come up against something that God called good, and then say it is bad and have any power or authority behind it? Nobody can.

2. Discover Who You Really Are

You can’t love yourself if you don’t know who you are. Who have you allowed to tell you who you are when they actually should have no say in the matter? A boyfriend? Angry schoolmates? Bitter co-workers? A broken past? The only one who holds the truth to who you are is God, and He wove them into the depths of your heart. Go back to your heart and discover who you are, and who He created you to be. If you find yourself stumped, open the Word of God and discover what He says about you. Here are some scriptures that will shed light on who you are in Christ: 2 Corinthians 5:21, Ephesians 1:4, Ephesians 2:10, Ephesians 3:12, Ephesians 4:24, Colossians 3:12.

3. Embrace Your Differences

Learn to not only embrace but also love who you are physically, mentally, and spiritually. Love that your hair is different, love that your laugh is goofy; God delights in you embracing the unique individual He created you to be. Your differences are what set you apart from everybody else and make you the perfect person for what God has called you to do. You have something others don’t for a reason.

4. Grow

Don’t be afraid to grow in who you are and in who God called you to be. Strive to be the best version of you on a daily basis and in your life. God has placed so much potential in you, it is up to you to grow into that fullest potential.

If need be, go on a journey with God to discover who you really are. If you know who you are, don’t be afraid to live it. It is only in knowing and loving who God created you to be that you will truly find your joy, peace, and freedom as a fearfully and wonderfully created being.

Bible translations used in this article:

New King James Version (NKJV)

Becoming the Best Version of You

1. Stop Comparing

2. Discover Who You Really Are

3. Embrace Your Differences

4. Grow